Awesome double meaning status updates for your Whatsapp or Facebook status and make fun with friends, followers and close ones. It’s an unique double meaning status updates gallery which will surely give you so much fun and pleasure. Let’s make the time more funny by sharing these most funny double meaning status updates, double meaning sms, double meaning jokes and quotes with friends and dearest one. Really, these funny statuses are too hilarious to make lough out louder whom you share!
Double Meaning Status Updates For Social Media.
Police officer: “Can you identify yourself, sir?”
Driver pulls out his mirror and says: “Yes, it’s me.”
Boy; Your singing beautifully! Girl: Thanks but I’m a bathroom singer. Boy: Then invite me for your live show!
Knock, Knock, who’s there? Ice cream! Ice cream who? Ice cream if you don’t let me in!
Women and rocks are very much alike … We skip the flat ones.
Yo momma is so fat when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight not your phone number.
My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.
Touch it gently, put 2 fingers inside, if it’s wide use 3 fingers, make sure it’s wet and rub up and down. Yep that’s how you wash a cup.
You keep smiling like that and everyone is gonna wonder what you did last night.
Bitch swear they Baby Smarter than every other Baby.. “My Baby can count to 10” Bitch he’s 18 years old, he supposed to!
You remind me of my Chinese friend… Ug Lee.
When my wife starts to sing I always go out and do some garden work so our neighbors can see there’s no domestic violence going on.
I’m a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?
What’s the differences between a woman with PMS and a Pitt Bull? – Lipstick
Doctor: Mrs. Anita good news for you! Girl: What do you mean Mrs. Anita? I’m Miss Anita! Doctor: Oh! Sorry Miss Anita…Bad news for you!
What did right boob say to the left one – you are my “breast friend”
When I see lovers’ names carved in a tree, I don’t think its cute. I just think it’s crazy how many people bring knives on a date.
“Mother, why do people die so quickly in our family?”
With just a Single kiss on the Lips for 30 sec, she Got Pregnant..! . . . . . Who is she? . . . . . Balloon!
My wife looked at me with her sexy eyes & said “I want you to make me scream with only two fingers” so I poked her in the eyes.
I went to the doctors the other day and I said, ‘Have you got anything for wind?’ So he gave me a kite.
A man asks a trainer in the gym: “I want 2 impress that beautiful girl, which machine I can use?” Trainer replies: “Use the ATM.”
Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.
Do you know the meaning of ABCDEFG? A boy can do everything for Girl. Reverse the meaning of, GFEDCBA; Girl forget everything done; Catches new boy Again.
Teacher told Max to write a sentence. Max wrote:”My penis in your hand” Teacher slapped Max why? Because he forgot to put space between Pen & is.
Victoria’s Secret fashion show… Typing this with my left hand.
Anton, do you think I’m a bad mother?
My name is Paul.
Never Kiss A Police Woman, She Will Say Stop-Hands Up, Never Kiss A Nurse She Will Say Next Please, Kiss A Teacher She Will Say Repeat It 5 Times.
At The Beginning Of Married Life, Every Girl Treats Her Husband As god, Later On Somehow That Alphabets Got Reversed!
Best Double Meaning SMS.
Difference between good girls and bad girls, good girls open few buttons in hot atmosphere, but bad girls open all buttons to make the atmosphere hot.
He took me from a bar. He took me in his car. He took my top off. He puts his lips on mine, but don’t worry: I’m a bottle of wine!
Most disciplined profession: military. Most undisciplined profession: politics.
Old meaning of sorry. “I won’t do it again.” New meaning of sorry. “Damn I got caught, next time I need to be more careful.”
Diagram in a book was not clear..So,madam drew a diagram on a Blackboard and announced “Don’t look at a book Figure,Look at my Figure!”
Whats the worst thing you can do to a blind man? Leave the plunger in the toilet!
If you hate doing something, it’s your destiny. If you love it, its God’s plan for you.
At 18 A Lady Is Like Football-22 Men Behind Her,at 28 Basket Ball-10 Men Behind Her,at 38 Golf Ball-1 Man Behind Her,at 48 Table Tennis Ball-1 Man Pushing Her To Another.
KISSING at the top, HOLDING at the middle & FIRE at the bottom! Do you know the ANSWER? What? huh.. don’t think dirty..It’s a..“CIGARETTE!”
20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please dont let Kevin Bacon die!
I’ve always wondered why “W” is called Double U when it’s clearly Double V…
When parents care it’s called restriction. When boyfriends care, ‘Oh my god, he’s so caring.
Fantastic Double Meaning Jokes For Friends.
Girls are most talented creature on earth. Because they listen half; understand quarter but explain it double.
Boy: Do You Know U Would Look More Sexy With One Kg Less, Girl- OK Janu, I Will Loose It As Soon As Possible. Boy: In My Opinion All Ur Clothes Weight Exactly One Kg.
Opposite sex attracts, but why not opposite castes and religions?
Q:Which part of Female Body is the most sensitive, is wet inside & Water comes out when something ENTERS in it? Answer:EYE! But I love the way u think.
Add a word to ruin a movie:
– Batman Begins College
– The Longest Yard Sale
– Charlotte’s Web Cam.
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Indian girls may not choose husbands themselves, but they do choose their jewelries.
There is nothing greater in this world than being loving parents. So take the first step today by getting married. Think different, do different!
Meaning of ”Forever”: never ending. Into eternity; infinite. Meaning of ”Forever” in relationships: next week; sometime soon.
Never try to understand women. You will end up wasting your time.
Dear, we arranged most funny double meaning status here which will help you to make fun with friends and close ones also it will be a fantastic way of your Whatsapp or Facebook status updates.