100 Best Drinking Status, Captions and Quotes

Drinking status and captions are often used to celebrate our achievements or victories with something special, and alcohol is one of the oldest drinks for this purpose. Moderate drinking can be good for one’s health. This post is dedicated to those who enjoy drinking. Nowadays, drinking is associated with nobility, but the passion for drinking varies from place to place. If you’re looking for the best drinking-related status, you can find yours on this page of drinking statuses, captions, and funny drinking quotes. Here, we’ve compiled the best and funniest drinking statuses from all over the internet. Please feel free to like, send, or share these drinking statuses with your friends and loved ones.

Drink Status

I’m not drunk, just a little stoned.

Cheers to good times and even better drinks.

Sometimes I drink water to surprise my liver.

I’m not as think as you drunk I am.

Drinking is like a hug in a glass.

A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts.

drinking status and alcohol quotes

Raise your glass and let’s toast to the good life!

A daily drink can be the perfect remedy to unwind and destress.

Here’s to alcohol, the rose-colored glasses of life.

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

I know I should give up drinking, but I am not a quitter.

I only drink on two occasions when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.

In wine there is wisdom, in beer, there is Freedom, in the water there are bacteria.

In victory, you deserve Champagne. In defeat you need it.

Beer is made by men, wine by God.

A person has to have a warm heart and a cold beer.

One tequila…. two tequila…. three tequila….. floor…

Beer is now cheaper than gas, do drink, don’t drive!

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient Champagne.

Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it.

Anyone who says that alcohol is a depressant isn’t drinking enough of it.

Read: Funny Wine Captions

Drunk Captions

One more drink and I’ll be under the host.

A drunk man never tells a lie.

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

I exercise self-control and never touch a beverage stronger than gin before breakfast.

Funny Alcohol Quotes and Drinking Status

Drink what you want; drink what you’re able. If you are drinking with me, you’ll be under the table.

I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.

I find the more I drink, the more interesting others become.

I drink to make other people more interesting.

All is fair in love and beer.

You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Life is too short to drink bad wine.

There are more old drunkards than old physicians.

Alcohol does not solve problems, but then again, neither does milk.

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Drinking Tip: Never buy the first-round cause that’s when people care what they’re drinking!

At my age I can no longer function without my glasses. Especially when they’re empty.

There’s a big difference between knowing what time the liquor store closes, and what time it opens.

It takes a lot of good beer to make great wine.

Champagne is appropriate for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

Read: Funny Double Meaning Status

Funny Drinking Status

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

Drinking with friends, because they know how to make me laugh.

I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer to do it with good company.

Alcohol, the cause and solution to all of life’s problems.

I have a drinking problem… I can’t seem to find my glass.

I’m not drunk, I’m just speaking in cursive.

I only drink on two occasions: when it’s my birthday and when it’s not.

Wine not?

I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer to have another one.

Alcohol you later.

Funny Drinking Status

I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right… after a few drinks.

I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a drinking solution.

When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.

We drink to one another’s health and spoil our own.

War and drink are the two things man is never too poor to buy.

Beer: because sometimes one drink just isn’t enough.

I have mixed drinks about feelings.

Drinking is fun! It makes me feel horrible and sexy!

Alcoholic friends are as easy to make as Sea Monkeys.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

Here’s to alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all life’s problems.

A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world.

My boss didn’t know I drank, till one day I came to work sober.

There comes a time in every woman’s life when the only thing that helps is a glass of Champagne.

Has realized that alcohol is very much like Pringles.

Ah that’s just drunk talk, sweet beautiful drunk talk.

Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families and careers.

Has often thought that what doesn’t kill us makes us drink stronger liquor.

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.

Nothing makes the future look so rosy as to contemplate it through a glass of Chambertin.

Age is just a number. It’s totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine.

Says God takes care of drunks and babies…do you know how lucky that is for drunk babies?

Drinking beer doesn’t make you fat; it makes you lean… against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.

Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.

I’ve never been drunk, but often I’ve been overserved.

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my scotch, I say, I’m thirsty, not dirty.

Alcohol Quotes

“Drink never made a man better, but it made many a man think he was better.” – Finley Peter Dunne

“A man’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink.” – W.C. Fields

Alcohol Quotes

“I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.” – Winston Churchill

“Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.” – George Bernard Shaw

“Drink because you are happy, but never because you are miserable.” – G.K. Chesterton

“It is sad that people need alcohol to make them happy.” – Habeeb Akande

“It’s a great advantage not to drink among hard drinking people.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald

“You can’t drown yourself in drink, I’ve tried; you float.” – John Barrymore

“Alcohol, taken in sufficient quantities, may produce all the effects of drunkenness.” – Oscar Wilde

“That’s all drugs and alcohol do, they cut off your emotions in the end.” – Ringo Starr

“Alcohol is a good preservative for everything but brains.” – Mary Pettibone Poole

“First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.” – Francis Scott Key Fitzgerald

“Wine is the most healthful and most hygienic of beverages.” – Louis Pasteur

“I would not put a thief in my mouth to steal my brains.” – William Shakespeare

“Fill up the goblet and reach to me some! Drinking makes wise, but dry fasting makes glum.” – William R. Alger

“Ignorance is a lot like alcohol: the more you have of it, the less you are able to see its effect on you.” – Jay Bylsma

“There are two kinds of people I don’t trust: people who don’t drink and people who collect stickers.” – Chelsea Handler

Read More: Caption for Profile Picture and Selfie

While alcoholism and drinking are serious matters, it’s surprising how many humorous quotes about alcohol we’ve encountered. Here, you’ll find some drinking statuses and captions that are not only funny but also highly entertaining. Take a moment to explore these witty statuses and share a hearty laugh with your friends.