Drinking Status and Captions : Most often we celebrate our achievement or victory by something special and alcohol is the most ancient drink to do that. Limited drinking is good for health. This post is dedicated to the people who love drinking. Nowadays drinking belongs to the symbol of nobility and passion for drinking is not the same everywhere. If you need some best status about drinking then find out yours from this page of drinking Status, captions and funny drinking quotes. Here we serialized the best and funny drinking status around the whole internet. Please feel free to like, send or share this drinking status with your friends and close ones.

Drinking Status For Whatsapp

I’m not as think as you drunk I am.

Sometimes I drink water to surprise my liver.

Here’s to alcohol, the rose colored glasses of life.

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.

I know I should give up drinking, but I am not a quitter.

In wine there is wisdom, in beer, there is Freedom, in the water there are bacteria.

In victory, you deserve Champagne. In defeat you need it.

Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient Champagne.

Wine improves with age. The older I get, the better I like it.

Anyone who says that alcohol is a depressant isn’t drinking enough of it.

A drunk man never tells a lie.

Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.

I only drink on two occasions when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.

Alcoholic friends are as easy to make as Sea Monkeys.

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts.

A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.

My boss didn’t know I drank, till one day I came to work sober.

Has often thought that what doesn’t kill us makes us drink stronger liquor.

Drinking Captions for Instargam

Beer is made by men, wine by God.

A person has to have a warm heart and a cold beer.

One tequila…. two tequila….. three tequila….. floor…

Beer is now cheaper than gas, do drink, don’t drive!

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

I exercise self-control and never touch a beverage stronger than gin before breakfast.

I drink to make other people more interesting.

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Drink what you want; drink what you’re able. If you are drinking with me, you’ll be under the table.

I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on.

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

I find the more I drink, the more interesting others become.

I swear to Drunk, I’m not God!

Of course I am gonna drive. I am too drunk to walk.

All is fair in love and beer.

You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

Life is too short to drink bad wine.

It takes a lot of good beer to make great wine.

Champagne is appropriate for breakfast, lunch or dinner.

One martini is alright, two is too many, three is not enough.

Drinking Status for Facebook

There are more old drunkards than old physicians.

Alcohol does not solve problems, but then again, neither does milk.

Thinks my computer should have a little alcohol measuring tube to blow into before posting a status on Facebook.

Scientists announced that they have located the gene for alcoholism. Scientists say they found it at a party, talking way too loudly.

A lady came up to me one day and said ‘Sir! You are drunk’, to which I replied ‘I am drunk today madam, and tomorrow I shall be sober but you will still be ugly.

Dear Alcohol, we had a deal, you were going to make me funnier, sexier, more intelligent and a better dancer. I saw the video, we need to talk.

Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.

Stumbled into bed late last night. “You’re drunk,” she said. “Also, you live next door.”

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I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.

When used separately, women and alcohol can be a lot of fun, but when you mix the two you become a dumb-ass.

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Is certain that it doesn’t matter if the glass is half empty or half full. There is clearly room for more vodka.

Part of me says I can’t keep drinking like this. The other part of me says, “Don’t listen to that guy. He’s drunk.

Drinking Tip: Never buy the first round cause that’s when people care what they’re drinking!

A woman just dropped a 20 dollar bill next to me. I thought, ‘What would Jesus do?’, so I turned it into wine … Well, I bought wine.

My boss told me that there is no such thing as problems, only opportunities. I said, “That’s great. Well, I have a serious drinking opportunity.”

At my age I can no longer function without my glasses. Especially when they’re empty.

There’s a big difference between knowing what time the liquor store closes, and what time it opens.

Nothing makes the future look so rosy as to contemplate it through a glass of Chambertin.

Funny Drinking Status

When I drink, I think; and when I think, I drink.

We drink to one another’s health and spoil our own.

War and drink are the two things man is never too poor to buy.

Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Thus, let us drink beer!

Here’s to alcohol, the cause of, and solution to, all life’s problems.

A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world.

There comes a time in every woman’s life when the only thing that helps is a glass of Champagne.

Has realized that alcohol is very much like Pringles.

Ah that’s just drunk talk, sweet beautiful drunk talk.

Alcohol is a perfect solvent: It dissolves marriages, families and careers.

He that drinks fast, pays slow.

Age is just a number. It’s totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine.

Says God takes care of drunks and babies…do you know how lucky that is for drunk babies?

An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.

Drinking beer doesn’t make you fat; it makes you lean… against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.

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Everybody should believe in something; I believe I’ll have another drink.

I’ve never been drunk, but often I’ve been overserved.

Whenever someone asks me if I want water with my scotch, I say, I’m thirsty, not dirty.

Though alcoholism and drinking is not a funny issue at all but there are many funny quotes on alcohol that we have come across! Here are some drinking status and captions that are too funny and entertaining. Take a look at this funny status and laugh out loud with your friends.