Explore our gallery of witty and hilarious dirty statuses, short dirty quotes, social media captions, and bio ideas that are guaranteed to make anyone burst into laughter. Sometimes, we all need a bit of a dirty status to have some fun and surprise our friends and followers. We believe that adding some witty and hilarious dirty statuses to your social profile is a way of recreating and updating your status. So, why not browse through the best dirty statuses, short dirty quotes, funny statuses, and share them with others? You can use them as your Whatsapp status, Facebook or Instagram captions, or even in messages. Get ready to spread some laughter!
Funny Dirty Status
There are 70 ways to keep a man happy. One is Alcohol…! The rest is 69……!
If you’re texting two people at the same time, you are bitextual.
Your lips are like wine & amp; I wanna get drunk.
Knows the real fountain of youth is to have a dirty mind and a naughty smile..
Smile… it’s the second-best thing to do with your lips.
Triple in the last 5 minutes!!!
What do the Chinese call a 69? Twocanchew!
I am not Virgin my life F**K me everyday.
I once made love for an hour and fifteen minutes.
If abortion is murder then are condoms kidnapping!
Why are bra singular and panties plural?
Without nipples, boobs would be pointless.
It’s a dirty way to fight, but I’m late for lunch.
I’m a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?
Needs to wash his mind out with soap..
What did right boob say to the left one – you are my “breast friend.”
If a Naked woman robbed a bank. Nobody could remember her face…
We live in a world where losing your iPhone is more dramatic than losing your virginity.
I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.
Touch it gently, put 2 fingers inside, if it’s wide use 3 fingers, make sure it’s wet and rub up and down. Yep that’s how you wash a cup.
Viagra is now available in powder form to put in your tea. It doesn’t enhance your performance but it does stop your biscuit going soft.
Boobs are like the Sun… you can stare at them directly just for a few seconds. But if you put on sunglasses, stare as much as you want!
A cute Nurse came for the interview. Dr: What salary U Expect? Nurse: Rs.10,000. Dr was overjoyed and said: My Pleasure. Nurse: With pleasure it’s 25,000
In a cramped bus. Lady: Something of yours is touching me. Man: Oh! That’s… that’s just my salary in my pocket. Lady: Did your salary just triple in the last 5 minutes?
Dirty Captions
Great minds think alike but dirty minds work together.
Good girls go to Heaven, bad girls just make you FEEL like you are in Heaven.
All I really want is someone with a good heart and a dirty mind.
Not all cute guys have girlfriends, most of them have boyfriends.
My legs are missing you in between them.
Of course, you’d warm up faster if you took your clothes off.
I think I should tell you What people are saying behind your back? Nice Ass…
Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don’t believe the kids should be given homework.
Women only need 3.5 inches to achieve maximum pleasure? it’s called a credit card.
You can’t be the top dog if you act like a pussy!
A man is only as old as the woman he feels.
Nowadays, legs spread quicker than rumors.
Women and rocks are very much alike … We skip the flat ones.
I always start writing with a clean piece of paper and a dirty mind.
Don’t call the world dirty because you forgot to clean your glasses.
I sent an angel to watch over you last night but he came back saying he can’t watch porn.
Woman without curves is like a road without bends…. You may get to your destination quicker, but the ride is boring as hell.
Also Read: Funny Naughty Status
Dirty Bio Ideas
People say I got a dirty mind, I just think I’ve got a good imagination lol.
I hate sitting in a seat warmed by someone else.
I do quite naughty things now. I do like to be a bit s*xy.
The true man wants two things: danger and play. For that reason, he wants woman, as the most dangerous playthings.
If you’re looking at this, it’s too late. You’re mine now!
What am I doing in your inappropriate thoughts right now?
Straight talk is a virtue. Dirty talk is a goddamn blessing.
If we were together right now, what would we be doing?
Sometimes to defeat somebody that plays dirty, you have to play dirty yourself.
Talk dirty to me and make my mind and body respond to your words.
Flirty boys are like a fish out a water without girls.
Don’t stand too close to the heater babe. Plastic melts.
It’s not necessary for everyone to like me. Not everyone matters!
Two words one finger keep it simple.
I never insult people, I only tell what they are.
Dirty Caption for Instagram Pic
Love is only a dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the species.
Friendship is like peeing in your pants. Everyone can see it but only you can feel Its true warmth.
Smile if you just had a naughty thought… yep, you just smiled!
I swear Instagram the new Photoshop for some ugly bi…es trying to look cute LOL.
I hate how chocolate immediately melt on my fingers. I mean… am I that hot?
Girls dont dress for boys, they dress for themselves. If girls dressed for boys, they’d just walk around naked all the time.
I wanna be freaky but only with one person you feel me.
There is only one way to fight, and that’s dirty.
I may have a bad mouth but I can do great things with it.
Don’t call the world dirty because you forgot to clean your glasses.
Show me your world and I’ll show you my universe.
Life is never boring with a dirty mind.
A foolish man cleans before becoming dirty.
You can’t be the top dog if you act like a pussy!
Hands are so overrated. I think I’ll use my mouth.
People say I have a dirty mind But I say it’s just creative.
Yes, I have a dirty mind and you’re on it.
God made dirt … God made guys so girls can flirt.
That awkward moment when your kindness is mistaken with flirting.
Just because you’re my Princess doesn’t mean I won’t f**k you like a slut.
Also Read : Funny Bitchy Status
Also Read : Best Flirt Status
With a touch of humor and a hint of naughtiness, these dirty statuses and quotes offer a playful way to entertain your friends and followers. So, go ahead and explore the collection, and let your sense of humor shine through with these amusing and engaging additions to your online presence.