Best funny status, funny quotes and funny messages for Whatsapp and Facebook. We are long waited to share these top 100 best funny status with our dear visitors. Make fun with friends and others by sharing best funny status or by updating your social medias profile status.
Best Funny Status
I live in a world of fantasy, so keep your reality away from me!
I want someone to look at me the way I look at cupcakes!!
I wake up when I cant hold my pee in any longer.
I Like to study.. Arithmetic – NO … world history – NO …. chemistry – NO …. GIRLS – YES!!!
Checking your symptoms on Google and accepting that fact that you’re going to die.
I don’t usually sleep enough, but when I do, it’s still not enough 😉
Flirtationship: More than a friendship and less than a relationship.
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.
Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up. 😀
My bed is always extra comfortable when I need to get out of it in the morning.
All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.
I hate fake people. You know what I’m talking about. Mannequins. 😀
You can never buy Love….But still you have to pay for it…
Mosquitoes are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.
God is really creative , i mean ..just look at me 😛
If College has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking 🙂
C.L.A.S.S- come late and start sleeping 🙂
We are WTF generation …. WhatsApp, Twitter and Facebook 😀
The most powerful words other than I LOVE YOU is “Salary is Credited” 🙂
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Funny Status For Whatsapp and Facebook
I only need 3 things in life: Food, WiFi, Sleep 🙂
At least mosquito’s are attracted to me.
Today’s Relationships: You can touch each other but not each others phones.
If school has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking 🙂
Never make eye contact while eating a banana.
Girls use Photoshop to look beautiful.. Boys use Photoshop to show their creativity.
When I’m a Pedestrian I Hate cars.. When I’m Driving I Hate Pedestrians…
Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software…it’s called #Monday, please fix it.
Life is too short smile while you still have teeth…
Hey there Whatsapp is using me.
Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.
Everything is 10x funnier when you are not supposed to laugh.
Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.
Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.
I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone. 🙂
The only thing I gained so far in THIS YEAR is weight 🙂
Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
I’ve had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide. 🙂
I really need 5 hours of Facebook to balance out my 5 minutes of studying.
A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.
I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice 🙂
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Short Funny Status Quotes and Status
I love my job only when I’m on vacation…..
Last seen 1980! 😀
Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.
My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death..!!
Who needs television when there is so much drama on Facebook.
Decided to burn lots of calories today so I set a fat kid on fire.
I’m Jealous Of My Parents… I’ll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!
People call me mike .. You can call me tonight. 😛
Wrestling is obviously fake. Why would two people fight over a belt when neither of them are wearing pants?
Dear Lord, all I ask for a chance to prove that winning the lottery won’t make a bad person.
Is there anything more awkward than when you are singing along to a song on youtube and the music stops loading.
I wonder what happens when doctor’s wife eats an apple a day. 🙂
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lol
Marriage is just a fancy word for adopting an overgrown male child who can not be handled by his parents anymore.
Did anyone else notice the sound if you click the like button on my status?
If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.
It’s been 70+ years, Tom. You’re never going to eat Jerry 🙂
God is really creative, I mean.. just look at me! 🙂
I’m not lazy, I’m on energy saving mode.
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Short Funny Quotes and Sayings:
Life is Short – Chat Fast!
6 Peg Loading .. 😀
Fact: Phone on silent mode- 10 Missed call… Turns volume to loud- Nobody calls all day!!
Everything funnier when your supposed to be quiet.
Save water drink beer.
Always wear cute pajamas to bed you’ll never know who you will meet in your dreams.
When I’m on my death bed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the…
My father always told me, ‘Find a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life.
My study period = 15 minutes. My break time = 3 hours.
Here my dad comes on Whatsapp… From now on my status would be ‘***no status***’ or just a smiley…
When a newly married man looks happy, we know why. But when a ten-year married man looks happy, we wonder why.
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Some people should have multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.
Laughing at your own texts before you send them because you are so damn funny.
When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
Restaurant Advertisement: We serve food as HOT as your neighbor’s wife; And beer as COLD as your own. 🙂
If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, nobody else wanted them either 🙂
Having a best friend with the same mental disorder is a blessing. LOL
There’s like 7 billion people in this world and no one wants to date me. I hate this world … huh
Friends are forever, until they get in a relationship!! 😛
In Modern Politics, Even The Leader Of The Free World Needs Help From The Sultan Of Facebookistan!!!
Latest Funny Whatsapp Status
People who exercise live longer, but what’s the point when those extra years are spent at gym.
It may look like I’m deep in thought, but 99% of the time I’m just thinking about what food to eat later.
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it. lolz
I am not addicted to WHATS APP. I only use it when I have time ……. lunch time, break time, bed time, this time, that time, any time, all the time. 🙂
If you are going to speak bad things about me on my back, come to me. I’ll tell you more.
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it.
Whoever says “Good Morning” on Monday’s deserves to get slapped 🙂
In bed, it’s 6AM you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it’s 7:45. At school it’s 1:30, close your eyes for 5 minutes, it’s 1:31.
GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.
Boys, if you don’t look like calvin klein models, don’t expect us to look like victoria secrets angels. (From All Bachelor Girls Association) 🙂
TODAY has been cancelled. Go back to BED 🙂
I am sure I have a defective iPhone, I keep pressing the home button and I’m still at work.
When a woman says WHAT? Its not because she didn’t hear you. She’s giving you a chance to change what you said.
One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions 🙂
If time does not wait for you, don’t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.
I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them 🙂
Years of education, solving tough problems, handling complex issues, yet we take a while standing before glass doors thinking whether to Push or Pull.
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