Sometime we are getting bored in our daily life than it wants to recreation. For this think here we listed best humor status quotes in a collection, which is very helpful to bring your smile. Look through the short Humor quotes which can support you to enjoy your time with friends. Moreover you can share the Humor Quotes on Whatsapp, Facebook and express your joys.
Humor Status Quotes For Whatsapp
Today morning when i was driving my Ferrari alarm woke me up.
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe.
I promise i will be a better person tomorrow 😉
When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car. – Bob Monkhouse
When people say “Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too”. Damn Right! What good is cake if you can’t eat it?
I don’t need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning.
Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet service to see who they really are. — Will Ferrell
Laugh as much as possible, always laugh. It’s the sweetest thing one can do for oneself & one’s fellow human beings. – Maya Angelou
Humor is a reminder that no matter how high the throne one sits on, one sits on one’s bottom. -Taki
Against the assault of laughter, nothing can stand. -Mark Twain
A day without laughter is a day wasted. -Charlie Chaplin
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Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won’t expect it back. -Oscar Wilde
When people say while watching a film, “did ya see that?” No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor!
I changed my password everywhere to ‘incorrect.’ That way when I forget it, it always reminds me, ‘Your password is incorrect’.
I thought I was promiscuous, but it turns out I was just thorough. — Russell Brand
Short Humor Quotes For Facebook Post
Facebook is like a fridge. When you’re bored you keep opening and closing it every few minutes to see if there’s anything good in it.
I’m pretty sure the best thing about Facebook is the ability to read other people’s fights.
A good laugh makes any interview, or any conversation, so much better. – Barbara Walters
Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn. -Irvin S. Cobb
Come to my Facebook profile, write on my wall : i’ll love you.
Humor must not professedly teach, and it must not professedly preach, but it must do both if it would live forever. – Mark Twain
Also Read : Funny Jokes for Facebook
LIKE if you have that one friend that Laughs at everything. Even when it’s not funny.
The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage. -Mark Russell.
People who ask “Can I ask you a question?”… Didn’t give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find, lucky to have.
I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. — Rita Rudner
Start every day off with a smile and get it over with. -W. C. Fields
You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I’m scared!
When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks “Has the bus come yet?” If the bus came, would I be standing here???
Humorous Status Updates
I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they get closer. Then it hit me.
Alcohol, what’s that? It’s not in my vodkabulary, but let me check in whiskypedia.
Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.
If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide. -Mahatma Gandhi
Don’t worry if plan A fails, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet.
When the past comes knocking, don’t answer. It has nothing new to tell you.
No mind is thoroughly well organized that is deficient in a sense of humor. – Samuel Taylor Coleridge
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When you fall, I will be there to catch you – With love, the floor.
If I had no sense of humor, I would long ago have committed suicide. -Mahatma Gandhi
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. -Steven Wright
Girls are like phones. We love to be held and talked to, but if you press the wrong button you’ll be disconnected!